Back to School

Ah, my favorite time of year. The weather starts to change, the leaves start to turn, the smell of the grill fills the air, and conversation turns to the grid iron. Also, this marks the end of tourist season in the DC area and a return to normalcy on metro.

I find it ironic that when the weather is most frustrating on metro during the summer (hot and humid), that it is also packed with people who are totally unfamiliar with the guidelines for riding on metro. Things like if you're not walking up the escalator, you stand on the right. If you don't, you get that large angry lady shouting at you "Excuse me!!! Stand on the right, walk on the left!!!"

Also, metro's designers would have you believe it's a commuting system, as most of the ridership works downtown. When you get on the train, you'll notice that no one talks to any one else, even if they're next door neighbors. And if people do talk, they get shot dirty looks and people turn up their iPods. On the metro, the riders want to be in their own world, listen to their iPods, and read their newpapers or books. Tourists don't understand this immediately, which makes them easy to identify because they're all chatty about whatever activity they just came from. The more outgoing tourist will engage YOU in conversation, usually about what the train conductor just said. Deciphering a conductor's announcements tends to be like understanding someone after they have just been punched in the mouth. Clearly, annunciation isn't on the checklist of things to look for in a train conductor.

Talking on cell phones also has it's own separate expectation. You have two categories of people who use their phone on the metro. You either have the hushed talker or the loud talker. Metro would prefer that all conversations be conducted in muted tones. Again, easy to identify the tourists because they're shouting into their cells. You also get the random passenger who feels that the rest of the car should know about their conversation. This happens primarily in the tunnels where people have a hard time hearing and shout because they think the people on the other end of the conversation are experiencing the same thing.

Moving to the center of the car when boarding is an advanced concept few seem to grasp, unless the car is extremely full. First time riders will tend to stand closest to the door where they can get in everyone's way and also look at the system map after every stop to make sure they know where they are. This isn't restricted to rookies though. Daily commuters will stand next to the door if they are riding a few stops, but at least anticipate which side of the car the doors will open and move to the opposite side.

The tourists do have one up on the normal riders, they clean up after themselves. The Washinton Post and Washington Times both publish free newspapers, which are distributed at all of the metro stations. While this service is appreciated, it means that you can sit in just about every seat on the train and find a paper to read because the regular commuters read theirs and simply leave them on the train. Tourists tend to take their trash with them when they leave the train.

The most enjoyable part of the end of tourist season is that the prized find, an empty seat, happens more frequently from now until the start of tourist season in the spring. That is unless a charter bus pulls in somewhere and fills a couple of cars.